break

I thought posting on my blog daily would help me stay on track with all that's going on, but I honestly feel a little overwhelmed right now. I feel there are other things that I need to focus on currently that have nothing to do with what I'm eating, so I'm taking a break.. A break from what, I haven't truly decided yet, but it's the best I can come up with right now.

Day 13

There is a line I read about this diet that I truly understand and believe after the last few days; because I lived it.

"Eat anything you like. Go ahead and have Pizza, Burgers, Chips, whatever your heart desires. You will come to learn how much you really enjoy these foods... not much at all."

Needless to say, I had a little "break" from Paleo the last few days (and not proud of it, but not giving myself too much hell either) and I TOTALLY feel a difference in how I'm feeling. I kind of had a revelation this morning while driving to town with DH and feeling absolutely wretched. The last 48 hours I had had - (another) cheeseburger basket, a few beans and olives, and a few bites of cold pizza with processed meat, and my stomach felt turned inside out. Sure, it tasted good at the time, but how do you really justify that when the same or next day you feel horrible? I was bloated, and had stomach cramps and just.. not good.. stuff you don't wanna know! When I ate strictly Paleo I had none of that. Weird? No. I'm a believer that this diet makes a difference on what happens on the inside. It truly helps from the inside out.

So here I am, Day 14, and getting inspired to get back on track. I need to go fruit/veggie shopping, that'll help, but I want to feel good!

Today was my worse eating day since I started this diet. I had absolutely nothing to day ALL day until 6 pm. We were on the go ALL day and I was getting super grumpy from not eating. we had some tacos on the way home and I inhaled them.. Not feeling so great right now. Lesson learned. Must keep and apple and nuts in my purse.

Days 11&12

Day 11

Breakfast/Lunch: Apples and orange slices. Really should have had a more substantial lunch, but I just felt uninspired.

 Snack: Popcorn. (A no no because it's a grain, but I figured it couldn't be that bad)

Dinner: That night I went out with some friends to celebrate the end of an era. The photography studio where I worked closed and we went to say goodbye, then went out to eat afterward. Something happened at the pharmacy on the way that triggered a stress eating situation (I don't want to talk about it) for me, but needless to say, I didn't make the rigtht choices. Had another cheeseburger basket with water. No photo, it was dark. I did get a picture of the sparkling apple juice I had for the toast at the studio...

Day 12

Breakfast: No breakfast again. I know that's bad for me and I need to knock it off and at least have a little something. To be worked on.

Lunch: By lunchtime I was starving and could have had anything! But I held off and got a little creative. I hollowed out and slice an acorn squash, drizzled it lightly with evoo, coriander and oregano, and roasted it in the oven for about 45 mins. Here it is before and after.

I then sliced it up, and put it in a salad made with romaine lettuce, carrots, tomatoes, garbanzo beans, black olives, red onion and a lemon juice and evoo dressing. SOOOOO GOOD!

Dinner: I had leftover salad fom lunch around 6pm and rested until Aaron got home, finally! Then when he came home he walked in with cold pizza.. I had a few bites..

Day 10

I am having some major cravings today.. I want some pasta.. BAD. Mac n cheese, plain noodles, anything will do. GAH! I'm trying so hard to stay out of the kitchen so I'm not tempted! We have lots of yummy carbs in the pantry lol..

Breakfast: A hardboiled egg.. Running very low on fruit, I have to replenish soon!

Lunch: My pasta craving was really strong and I almost made macaroni and cheese, but I held off and made this instead. Veggie and Shrimp stir fry. It has brussel sprouts, broccoli, shallots, garlic, bean sprouts, mushrooms, carrots and shrimp. Since I've been using little to no salt for the past 10 days, I could really taste how salty the shrimp were from being in sea water! So interesting!

Snack: Grannysmith apple and toasted nuts.

Dinner: Nothing to be proud of.. Cheeseburger basket. Ah well.

Day 9

Breakfast: Toasted nuts.

Lunch: Fresh Pineapple and pear and a hard boiled egg.

Dinner: I made fajitas for the house for dinner and took some of the mixture (onions, peppers, chicken and steak with seasoning - no salt) and put it on top of a spinach salad with cilantro and green onions and a little bit of oil and vinegar.. Oh and my "cheat" for the evening was a few black olives on top :)

Day 8

Not a super fantastic eating day today, but ah well. Went to my Dr's appointment this morning and it went pretty well. She diagnosed me with Situational Depression and I have to do a full panel of blood work before we figure out the next steps. Afterward I went out to lunch with my grandma, and had a...

Breakfast: Actually skipped breakfast today. No time..


Lunch: Patty melt and fries. No photo. I didn't finish either, but still.. Greasy = No good.

Snack: I took my raw nuts and toasted them in the oven! Really delicious!

Dinner: Chicken breast and vegetable stir fry with no sauce. Seasoned with pepper, oregano and corriander.

Day 7

I'll be the first to admitt that when things get tough emotionally, I turn to food. I'm an emotional eater. If I'm feeling stressed or anxious, or sad, it's nothing a bag of cheetos won't fix. Unfortunately, today was one of those days. For various reasons, I've had a very emotionally trying weekend with lots of emotions and crying, and today I gave in to a craving. I don't feel badly about it, I don't want to put extra guilt and negativity in my world right now if I can avoid it, I'm just being honest about it. Hopefully tomorrow after my doctor's appointment I'll feel better, and I can get back on track.

Breakfast: A fresh pear.

Lunch: My dear sweet DH was trying to make me feel better, and after feeling inspired last night because he watched "Chopped" on the food network, he decided he was going to make me lunch. I usually love everything he makes, but I have to admitt this one was a little off on the tastebuds for me. He sauteed an onion, with shredded brussel sprouts (which I usually love), a cubed chicken breast, mushrooms and cilantro, and dressed it with a dressing made of balsamic vinegar, a strawberry, a shot of coconut rum, and dijon mustard. I think he may have taken the "mystery ingredient basket" idea a little too far, but I really appreciated the effort he put into trying to whip me up something to make me feel better. He put a few pieces of whole grain toast on the side and called his masterpiece a warm chicken salad. I took a few bites, but the mustard, rum, strawberry and vinegar dressing was a little too much for me. I love him very much for trying :)

Snack: A small bag of cheeto puffs and some fresh pinapple.

Dinner: (no photos, my phone was dead) a big bowl of sliced strawberries, sliced oranges, and fresh pineapple chunks along with a leftover beef/turkey charbroiled burger patty from Friday. Just the patty, for protein. Tasty!

Day 6

We slept in this morning and it felt SO good! Subsequently, I didn't eat "breakfast" until almost noon hehe. I just finished it about 30 minutes ago and I'm still hungry, so I think I might follow up with lunch soon. Tonight, I know in advance I'll have another "cheat". DH is making slow cooked beef enchiladas with corn tortillas and lotsa cheese and a salty sauce. But he hardly gets to cook because he works so much, and he loves it.. It would probably break his heart if I told him I couldn't eat it. Plus, who can resist a good plate of Mexican food once in a while? I'll just make a side salad for everyone and have more salad than enchiladas :) I'm not worried about it.

Breakfast: One orange, one papaya, and a hard boiled egg with a glass of water.

Lunch: Spinach salad with a sliced grilled chicken breast on top, and a DRINK! A glass of orange juice with half a shot of passion fruit rum. I needed it.

Dinner: Shredded beef enchiladas (2) and a side spinach salad with carrots and celery, EVOO and balsamic vinegar dressing.

Here we go!

Ready? Set? PALEO!

2 days ago, Monday, I started a new eating regimen. I've decided to call it my new "eating plan" versus my new "diet". I want to stay motivated to keep it fun and light, not a chore.. Make sense? This TTC blog (which it hasn't been for a few months anyway) is going to go on the  back burner for a while and become something that will follow me on a separate journey for a while. Still a part of the same goal, but changing direction for a little while.

Like I've mentioned in many posts before, the main cause of our infertility problems is because of my PCOS and insulin resistance. Which, let's be honest, translates in part to being overweight. I've known this in the back of my mind for a long time, and I knew I had to make a change. What have I been waiting for? I'm not sure. I've started, then stopped. Had success, then failure. Been desperate to make our dreams of starting our family come true, just to get discouraged, disappointed, and fall back into darkness. Not only am I ready to try to commit to this 100%, but I think I am ready to admit that for the last 6 months or so, I have been a little depressed. I have a doctor's appointment on Monday with a new doctor to discuss all these things, and I'm happy about it.

Anyhow! Back to Paleo! I did some research about a diet that a friend I met through TTC told me about. She did it for a while and had really awesome success that brought her the most beautiful gift, her beautiful son Jackson. Paleo, Caveman, PCOS diet, whatever you want to call it, I read up on it and I really liked what I was learning. If you severely break it down, it looks like this:

NOT ALLOWED
Carbs (grains, flours, pasta, potatoes ect...)
Sugars
Dairy
Processed foods

ALLOWED
Lean protein (meats and seafood, eggs)
Vegetables (especially dark green veggies)
Fruits
Raw nuts


Basically, that's what the concept is, and if you're looking at it from the outside, I'm sure it looks really difficult and severe, but so far, I haven't missed anything! I've had temptations, yes, but so far I've been able to resist! And the best part about the plan, is it's not restrictive. The book I'm reading says, hey! If you want carbs, eat carbs. Don't limit yourself (obviously, to a certain extent) so you don't feel cheated. Strive at first for making 5 meals or snacks a week "cheating" if you want them, and gradually, limit that number so that you are eating almost 100% paleo. It's a great book that explains the eating plan in detail and helps with tricks and tips. Additionally, it's a great recipe book! It's filled with lots of easy, accessible recipes that I want to eat! I highly recommend it if you're interested in learning more!

So there it is! I've decided to blog about this to help me stay motivated and excited to post about my ups and downs and my rediscovering how to eat to help fix my problems. I will try to take a picture of what I make to eat each day, and post about it. I'm fortunate enough to be able to cook all my meals at home right now so it's easy to stick to it, as long as I stay on top of the grocery shopping! So here's to a new adventure! Cheers!


DAY 1
Breakfast: Fresh pineapple chunks and strawberries (forgot to take a pic!)

Lunch: Grilled marinated portobello mushroom (marinated in evoo, garlic and oregano) and grilled asparagus.

Snack: Raw nuts

That night, I was very sick and fell asleep and didn't wake up!! So no dinner to show.

DAY 2
Breakfast: Egg white, mushroom and spinach scramble, with pineapple on the side.

Lunch: At lunch, I was still feeling sick, so I just had some raw nuts and a fresh pear.

Dinner: Charbroiled Carne Asada with a side of asparagus and a sauce made from fresh tomatoes and onions.

Snack: Fresh pear



DAY 3
Breakfast: Fresh strawberries.

Lunch: Spinach salad with carrots, tomatoes, red onion, lime and garlic marinated grilled shrimp, and a lemon-lime-evoo dressing.

Snack: Fresh apple

Dinner: Side spinach salad with lemon-lime dressing and a slice of turkey meatloaf.

Days 4 & 5

Days 4 and 5 have been just as easy, if not funner! Exploring new recipes is fun and exciting when you've got the time and patience. I have 75% of both right now. Lucia has been keeping me a little busy with baby clinginess, but that's all part of the fun, right?


DAY 4
Breakfast: Sliced oranges and pear.

Lunch: Roasted beets, carrots, and red onion with a grilled boneless skinless chicken breast.

Snack: Grannysmith apple.

Dinner: Vegetable (Caluliflower, broccoli, carrot, onion, tomatoe, mushroom) coconut curry sprinkled with fresh parsley and cilantro and lime juice.

Snack: Fresh Pear.

DAY 5
Breakfast: Grilled asparagus, one hard boiled egg, and grilled flat iron steak.

Lunch: Vegetable coconut curry revisited :)

Snack: Fresh strawberries:

Dinner: My first "cheat" of the week. Charbroiled turkey/beef burger with a drizzle of ketchup, pickles, lettuce and tomatoes on a white sesame bun. I needed it, too. Watching my Hawks lose in the finals definitely required a few grams of carbs :(  Picture was taken hastily as well, as the game was on. hehe. I had this with a fresh apple.

And once again..

I am foiled by the evil force that is my period. It started, on CD39, with a vengence. Ah well. As long as it's here on it's own again, I guess I don't care. I found out what all the weird spotting does... It equals having your light days so when CD1 is really here, it kicks your ass! But like I said, ah well. At least now this new cycle can start, and I'm going to keep really good track with OPKs this month, just to see if I'm ovulating, for my own curiosity's sake. I kinda doubt it, but crazier things have happened. So we shall see!

I guess it was nice while it lasted

Well, today is CD38, and no sign of AF. It's been an interesting last 2 weeks or so. On CD26, I had a little bit of spotting, so I was super excited, thinking I was right on track to start on CD28 again, but nothing. On CD29 I had some more spotting but it was very odd. One swipe of bright red, then a dark rusty brown, then nothing again. I took 2 HPTs in between CD26 and CD34. Both negative. Then another light tinge of light pink on CD35, and here we are now on CD38. It's frustrating, because I don't know what the spotting means. Maybe it's my body's weak attempt at having a period, but it never really happened? Who knows. The only thing I'm sure of is that CD42 is creeping up and that is the last day I can try to patiently wait for AF to show before I have to start taking provera. I'll take one more HPT before I start taking it, just in case, but I sure as hell am not holding my breath. I'm not feeling anything remotely indicative of pregnancy, but you just never know I guess. I just want to be sure. Just another frustrating bump in the road, but what else is new. Just part of the game.