It's CD 7 already!! Woo!

I can't believe how fast this cycle is going! I am amazed! The extra time I needed to jump start my period is really what kept each cycle taking 2 months! I'm so excited! I'm actually having a period 2 months in a row! Tomorrow is friday, and already, monday I start taking OPKs! Yikes! I can't wait to O! :D

Game Over.

I started my period yesterday.

I was sad for about 5 minutes, but then I started thinking. I have no time to be sad. I can't sit here and dwell on something I cannot change. I have so many positive things to take away from this cycle, being sad would almost be cheating myself! I'm happy! I OVULATED! I actually produced an egg!! And I started my period ALL by myself, in a very timely manner! This is very good! Maybe my system is being jolted back into doing what it's supposed to!

I start taking Clomid again tomorrow. I can't believe it! Usually I have to wait so long in between cycles because I have to take Provera to start my period. It usually ends up being an extra 2 weeks of waiting! Now we get to try again (hopefully!!) in about 20 days!! I can't wait to see if Clomid on this dosage makes me ovulate again.

My doctor has decided to put me on another medication this time around. It's called Metformin. It is typically a drug that type 2 diabetics take. Upon further reviewing my original test results, Dr. Sikes decided that my blood glucose was on the high range of normal and that maybe (because of other symptoms I've been having) I was insulin resistant. In short, being insulin resistant screws up your hormones, produces too much testosterone, which makes it hard to ovulate. Here is an excerpt from a website that can describe it much better than I can:
Insulin is the hormone that delivers glucose into your cells to be burned as fuel, or stored as fat. Women with infertility frequently have "insulin resistance", a condition where excessive amounts of insulin are required in order to get blood glucose moved into energy cells, where it belongs. Metformin helps your body to transport glucose with relatively less insulin, thus lowering your insulin levels. Chronically high levels of either glucose or insulin in your blood contributes to obesity, heart disease, infertility, and certain cancers, as well as the development of diabetes.

So hopefully, combined with Clomid, this will help me have a successful cycle! The only downside is that the side effects are really nasty. My doctor has warned me that I'll be feeling bad for about a month.. Nausea, upset stomach, vomiting, diarrhea.. yuck. Ah well! If it helps, I'll try it.

So here we are! Starting anew! I can't wait to see what it brings!

3dpo... And now we wait...

The timing was perfect, everything went right.. Now we wait to see what happens.

I've decided I'm going to take a short hiatus from my blog. The next 10 days or so are going to pass by painfully slow, but when we take that test and get the results, I'm going to need time before I tell everyone the outcome. If it's positive, we want to keep it a secret until we can make sure everything is ok. If it's negative, I think I'm going to need a little alone time before diving back in.

Keeping my fingers crossed for the best results possible, and if/when it's time, it will bring me great joy to share with you all!

Day Two!!

This morning I took another OPK just to see if I would get a positive, and the circle was empty! I was really bummed, thinking that if the surge lasted time wise, it should still be there. I was trying to stay positive that it wasn't a fluke, but I still wanted to take another one later this afternoon. Funnily, I took it again at the Rose Garden. We were there for another hockey game.. hehe. Anna came with us and she was in the stall with me when the smiley face appeared again!! I guess I can only get a positive OPK at sporting events! lol. The line inside the OPK was much darker, too! YAY!!!

"O" MY GOD!

It happened. I can't believe it. I kind of had a feeling after this afternoon's dark test, but at the same time I was so shocked to see that little smiley face appear. And the best part? It happened at a hockey game! LOL. I needed to save up my pee to get a more accurate reading, so I brought an OPK with me to the game. We walked in the doors of the Rose Garden at 6 pm, and I headed straight for the restroom. I was sitting there in the stall, waiting the 3 minutes for the results to pop up and feeling a little self concious as I heard the buzz of activity right outside my door. Women coming in and out, chatting, completely oblivious to the fact that I was in there nervously waiting for the damn thing to load. I glanced back at it, saw the smiley face, and screamed "OH MY GOD!!!!!!" out loud. I probably startled a few people. I took a picture of it, to make sure it was real, then I ran out to the concourse to find DH. I ran to him and showed him, and he said "Are you fucking kidding me???" hahaha!! then I cried in his arms. I was SO HAPPY! FINALLY!!!! Now we just need to do the fun part ;-) I can't believe I get my very own first 2ww!!! EEEEK! I hope HOPE hope we can catch that egg!!

Maybe there's hope!

This morning I got home from hanging out with Jen and had to pee pretty bad. I went without taking an OPK with me, totally spacing that I had to take one. Just now I decided to try it before we left for the day but I barely had to go. I squeezed out what I could and got a negative OPK, but the line was the darkest I've seen it ever! It's so much darker looking in person, but here is a photo. I'll take another later this afternoon!!

Goodbye, late September.

I know, I know.. It was a hell of a long shot, but a teeny little part of me was hanging on to the fact that the baby psychic said late September would be when we would conceive or find out we were pregnant. October 1st is bittersweet. Another day gone, a day closer to fate. Whatever that is. It's not like I truly believed that it would happen, but it still saddened me today to stare at the calendar and see the month change. Tomorrow is CD21 and still, no O. I'll be patient though. I'll test until I run out of OPKs. I have 5 or 6 more in the box. I still have very good cervical position and plenty of CM, so that's a good sign. I just hate the waiting!! It's so hard to go through the day without constantly thinking about it. I try hard. But it still creeps in a few times an hour. I've gotten better about not talking about it so much with my friends (who know) and Aaron. I think I drove people a little nuts :)

I had kind of a down day today. Seeing a negative OPK day after day gets difficult after a while. I got a little depressed for a few hours. But I have to keep thinking of the positive and hang on to something! So to make me feel better, I listened to this song on my ipod.

Hey, it worked for Cinderella, right?

A dream is a wish your heart makes
When you're fast asleep
In dreams you lose your heartaches
Whatever you wish for, you keep
Have faith in your dreams and someday
Your rainbow will come smiling through
No matter how your heart is grieving
If you keep on believing
the dream that you wish will come true