In 4 days ...

In 4 days, I finally go to my first doctor's appointment. We had a few hiccups with getting our insurance all figured out, but it's finally time. I'm feeling nervous and scared, but mostly stressed. I've had 4 or 5 stressful dreams about it the last few nights... Things like not being able to find the doctor's office, forgetting my paperwork and insurance card once I finally get there, and getting lost down a long long hallway on my way to the exam room.. I know none of these things will actually happen in real life, so I don't know why I'm so wound up... I think it's just finally dawning on me that ready or not, I'm going to get answers.. in 4 days.. Well, maybe not in 4 days, but in 4 days I will definitely be on the path that will get me those answers...

Am I ready to hear them? Yes and no. No because I'm scared that it's bad news and I don't know how I'll react.. and Yes because even though I'm already setting myself up to get bad news, I want to know. I NEED to know. Seems like time is going by so so slow right now.. I've waited so long to take care of this and now that it's within days of happening, I'm the most impatient I've ever been. It's like, come on already!! I need to hear it..

I'm so thankful that I will have supporters with me that day. Jen and Anna, thank you.

Here's to hoping that the next few days will fly by. And once i have some real answers, I will be more open about what it is. I just don't want to speculate and be wrong. You just never know in life.

February 21st, 2010.

Today, I have been married for 6 months exactly. I can't believe how fast these months have gone by!! To me, the 6 months prior to the wedding, and the 6 months after have FLOWN by. These months have seen a lot of ups and down. Firstly, our honeymoon. Our first REAL vacation together =) Then, even though it ended badly, Aaron getting his job back at Pacific Breeze was an important part of getting back on our feet. And now, after 4 LONG crazy weeks of being emotionally up and down and super stressed out, we finally know he is officially hired by Schwan's. =) I am so happy for him. It's been a long difficult journey of feeling stressed and doubting his self worth. He starts working tomorrow, and I think it will be all downhill from here. We are hoping this will set up the future for us.

For me these last 2 months, it's been a different emotional battle. I've been trying really hard not to think about it too much, or even talk about it with anyone, but it's starting to take it's toll. This is another reason I'm very much relieved that Aaron got this job. We will have access to very good medical insurance and I can finally go to the doctor's to confirm or hopefully absolve my suspicions. I'm not too worried, because I know that no matter what, we can fix it. But it's still stressful to think about. Well, hopefully it won't be a question in the back of my mind too much longer.

Tired of ...

-Waiting.
-Not Knowing.
-The Anticipation.
-The Letdowns.
-The Frustration.
-The Insecurities.
-The Second Guessing my Gut Feeling.
-The Disappointed Faces.
-The "Feeling".
- The Wanting and Longing for What's Rightfully Mine.
- I'm just Tired of IT.

sitting here

watching friends =) ah yes, the joys of friends. on a big screen. Season 3, the hug and roll, race car bed and Frank Jr disc. I'm lucky to be sitting here enjoying life. =) the end.

Blogging? Me?

Well, here I am.. Blogging. Hmmm.. Interesting indeed. Never thought I would have a blog, but what do you know. Life may get interesting this year, and I thought it would be fun to start sharing with everyone! I'm assuming that most people who will be reading this blog probably know me well; but just in case there are some newbies, here is a little about me.

I'm Melodie Peachey.. obviously =) Just became a Mrs. this last August 21st when I married my wonderful husband, Aaron. We live in Cornelius, OR (aka BFE) in a small apartment with our dogs Oscar and Gretchen. I work for a wonderful family as a nanny. I take care of a 2 year old girl named Addie and a 4 month old boy named Sebastian. My husband will start a new job next monday working for Schwan's. We are very excited about this, as it will help us be a little closer to the financial stability we are trying to achieve.

Well, that's pretty much it! The Peacheys in a nutshell. Not sure how often I'll be updating my blog, but stay tuned for more to come =)